Breaking Cycles
After seeing several different stories in different regions of the country in this weekend’s newspapers regarding child abuse (including yet another teacher who’s been charged with molesting one of her 12 year old male students) and drug abuse, I started thinking about the correlation with different problems that are wreaking havoc in our social structures. After about the four or fifth research report that discussed findings from many sociologists and psychiatrists, it became clear that there are not only predictable denominators, but the basic foundations are always very similar.
The vicious cycles associated with all forms of abuse are reliable by definition. For instance, some warning signs of abused children include:
- Depression at an early age
- Withdrawal from classmates, friends and those outside their immediate families
- Older kids are at much higher risks to become drug addicts and alcoholics
- MPD (multiple personality disorder) is more common that some may think. Most psychologists and psychiatrists agree that these other personalities are formed as protective mechanisms that allow another identity to “step in” to allow the child to escape while the abuse is being inflicted. This remains one of the most controversial diagnoses in the psychiatric field. Some are more comfortable with classifying this as a form of post stress disorder; regardless, there are many who’ve been diagnosed with MPD or DID (dissociative identity disorder), as it was most recently renamed. Another important factor is the ratio of female to male diagnoses is 9 to 1 (girls are ten times as likely to be sexually abused).
- Suicide attempts
- Acting out with inappropriate sexual behaviors even before puberty (most often saw in children who have been victims of sexual abuse)
Once these children reach adulthood, the myriad of problems they’re likely to encounter are extensions of those that developed years earlier. Often, without resolution via counseling or not being allowed to pursue legal avenues to prosecute these abusers, the cycle begins once again. Often, women who were abused as children grow up to marry men who continue the abuse into the marriage, and any children that are born during the marriage become victims themselves of the same abuse his parent(s) suffered. Too many times, mothers who were forced to submit to incest with siblings or even their fathers will be helpless to ensure her own’s child’s safety. These women are most likely to become chronically depressed, addicts, alcoholics and are almost always passive in nature. They’re not capable of protecting their children from the same fate that’s destroyed their own lives.
Perhaps the most disturbing aspect of this cycle is the common profile of a pedophile. Many pedophiles were abused as children, had parents who were addicts and alcoholics, had low self esteem and were pulled out of school. Clearly, the cycle repeats time and again. Other factors of victims once they’re reached adulthood and have become parents include neglect towards their children and provided they’re not removed from the custody of their parents, those who do drugs can sometimes introduce their own children to these addictive patterns, thereby ensuring a new generation of drug users.
So, what is the answer? Experts, of course, disagree on the best solution, but some of the most obvious include allowing the victim his day in court. If kids don’t have an adult to step up to the plate for them, they will certainly carry that with them and will equate it to not being important enough to seek justice. Legislation efforts are also awaiting the review process, and most agree (or at least hope for) the punishments will become harsher for abusers. Despite all of the many programs that are in place, far too many fall through the cracks and sadly, some don’t live to tell the tale. For those who are removed from the abusive homes and are placed in foster care or other protective custody are sometimes returned due to lack of proof of abuse. The most frustrating aspect is, of course, breaking the cycle when there seems to be no one agency or methods to slow it down long enough to break it before it gets the desperate places that send up the red flags. With that said, there do appear to be ways to protect some of these little ones. By using a team approach designed to protect the rights of these kids, a lawyer or lawyers who represent these minors often work hand in hand with government agencies, counselors and even the foster parents at times when appropriate. These combined effort works to the advantage of these young clients and are often the first time these kids feel as though someone is looking out for them.


